Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Coding with a name??

Some friends including women brand me and Shreema as men-hated feminist. And this is something really funny and sometime annoying for the fact that giving an appropriate answer to a man who unreasonably show off his male ego is not an anti-men and this is not called a task of feminism. My way of calling a woman a feminist is not about asking the men and society that "I want to be like man" but simply asking don't encroach my space, let me enjoy my womanhood. I never wish to be a man, simply I don't have any intention to hate every man though most of them are not worth of loving.

It's a vague allegation that feminist hate man and they are against the man ideology. But the fact that feminist are the only women who can love a man without attaching to any social and material benefits. The only woman who can love a man for what he is; without looking for a gain and status is a feminist but they will never compromise their individuality and that may be a threat to most of the man. But branding them as man -hated bunch of women is a false implication. So far I set free my man to walk away from my life without even asking him to stay back for a moment when he chooses a different path then it does not mean I hate him or do not want to be with him. It's simply giving space to someone to enjoy their own freedom of taking a decision, I will never bind a man with few teardrops, blackmailing or whatever, that's beyond my dignity and that will disguise my concept of being in love. I believe in setting someone free and I don't believe in showing off to the world and society in large that we are together for a decade while they are not even together within four walls of the room.

Nowadays its a trend a husband and wife saying each other "I love You" and I miss you in Facebook and other social media. And literally I wonder when they even write they had wonderful sex in their marriage and this is how people are so obsessed of maintaining their image as so called lovely-dubby couple when they are pole apart even in their bedroom. Once a friend called me and we were seating in a restaurant to catch up after a long time and after 15 minutes what he started was about how his wife is nagging him and he being in trouble as he can not divorce her and from next day onward I stop taking his call but I still show both of them doing all kind love you honey in Facebook. I don't understand the meaning of such marriage and even maintaining a relationship of such kind. Why I hate such type of men is that they don't even have the respect of the woman whom he is sharing a bed and who else he can respect in this world? And I don't see any point of even sharing a conversation with such men who would open their mouth to criticize their own wife.

When I'm fond of someone or even in love I can not hide and it's very obvious from my behavior towards him. People are so conscious and so judgmental when it comes to someone telling their true emotions but how hypocritical they are when it comes to showing off. My concept of feminism is living in a world where I can freely express my love and saying freely to a man that I owe him my love without any fear of judgement. In school, I hardly interact with boys in my class and they all branded me as men-hated women. But I left everyone with a stunt face when they came to know that I asked out for a coffee date to my senior, who everyone thought of belonging to a different status. And everyone judged me as dominating girl who did something odd and out of tradition. When we broke off after his two-in-one theory was unfolded, everyone judged me again saying it was ought to happen instead of understanding my emotions of being cheated. When I confront everyone said why you had to do since you have asked him out. This is how the world judge when a woman choose the one they love instead of giving that decision only to a man. That's contrary to what pseudo-intellectuals thinking that feminist are male-hated group. And first of all demanding for a equal right and space does not mean shadowing the existence of men, rather than asking men to swallow their ego and give the space to the women that has been unnecessarily occupied by them.

Well and good. I don't mind some men even thinking that I hate their male chauvinist mind who claimed that men and women are not brought up equally and so it's justified to look down woman. I'm rather in a safer space if they hate me too. I know to whom I can fall in love and I do tell them for sure that I do owe my love to him; I will keep on telling whoever I fall in love and that's my concept of feminism where I will not have any fear to be in love with a real man!

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