Sunday, September 20, 2015

The definition of being Good women !!

Finally I have confirmed to myself and stretch myself till the farthest limitation that I could to conclude that I'm tired of being good, perhaps a good woman. My life seems to be more threaten with the men living around me in the form of father, brother, relative and any other relationship than any other terrorist. They only expect me to be a good daughter, sister, girlfriend or whatever but to be a good woman. You can no longer be a peaceful human to become a good woman. When you come back home after working 9 hours in office, travelling for 3 hours in metro, your brothers expect that I should cook and clean the room. Whether they are sitting at home whole day or not, it does not matter. But you have to do it because I'm the woman in the room. I really crushed this generation of mother who made themselves a servant and brought up their sons without a sense of responsibility at the house they are living and to understand the woman they are living or will live whole their life. Time is changed. Woman are changed. Woman are no longer playing one role of cooking, washing clothes and dishes but our men are yet to go for few more generation to catch up with the new generation of woman. They expect to earn good and smart because you can not survive with one man earning economy with so much of demand and live a comfortable life. But when you come back home, you forget everything that the same woman perhaps have spent the same or more number of hours than him in the office or travel. Let it be your father, brother, husband will never ask you if their daughter, sister or wife is tired or they can help them. If you do not do what they expect then you are a selfish you and the home is no longer home. Everything is blamed to a woman but they never thought of giving up their inherent selfish habit of what man should not do.

The world is always cruel. It can not tolerate a woman who is capable of managing their own life, taking their own decision but they do not mind they becoming a major financial contributor in the family. But in their eyes you can never grow beyond their outdated definition of what a good woman should be.

Who wants to welcome you at your room all the time with dusty floors, unwashed dishes, untidy bed ad dirty bathroom. Is all these stuffs are meant for woman only. What really put me numb is my teenage brother whenever they go home started to behave like my mother is their all time servant. Which civilisation has taught that man can not take their plate and wash themselves. I'm totally amazed with the definition of their love for their own mother, sisters which they can not see beyond being their maid to clean their room, bathroom, bed and wash the dishes. At times I felt that why such a foolish relationship for the sake of providing comfort to another while other is totally exploited and suppressed. Even if I'm more capable to do many other other things than any one my male siblings, I will be no where ten years down the line. It is easy to say anything and make any rules of society and family by male dominated world. But living under such expectation, systematic suppression and saving the false pride of man which are inherited from the selfish habit is truly tiring.

Yes, being good and being trustworthy is the most unworthy responsibility. My father has no expectation from his other sons and daughter. At time they called to inform one is having headache, other can not go to bathroom and other is doing this and that. In the whole process no one could even think for a moment that what I want from my own life and little time I get after slogging 9 hours in office and travelling for 3 hours daily in busy metro. At times I feel terrible about myself that no one even asked me once in this lifetime what I wanted to do with my life. It is all about meeting the end of what they want, what they expect and what they want me to do. The day you even spent a hour for yourself, even you sleep even an hour more than they expect then you are no longer a good woman. Their definition is too shallow, its third world definition of woman and I really need to find out a way what I really want to do now and it seems already too late living with so many expectations on me by so many people who could not even understand that I'm a simple human just like them and I too has limit and feel the pain in knees, joints just like anyone of them. I do not need to tell them that I'm a human or super human but it is better to leave them in their own way to treat their own selfishness.