Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Just like a long lost lover!

Somehow in my words, in my deeds and in my talks you have become a reason to laugh and bring a smile for the past few months. And finally I'm feeling sad of the fact that everything will go away with time. The time will swallow every remnants of the memory. Of your smile, of your laughter and I do not know I'm trying to gather everything and bind them so hard that it never left my memories. Nothing have been told between us except through the eyes and the smiles across the crowd. I know you do not think anything serious about any kind of emotional involvement neither do I but every part of the memory was a reason to smile and laugh for me. That's only reason I was left at that time. I know we stand poles apart and there could never be a meeting point. I never thought of losing of a such a moment, everyone seems to be moved on including you, except me, seems to be still standing there and waiting for you all alone.

 How would I even tell you that I even had the most painful wait of this lifetime, without even having the courage to tell that for hours I waited across the road where I used to wait for you. Every weekend just passed by mercilessly and I thought at least in a faithful Saturday you would suddenly cross my way and pass a smile just like earlier. With a hopeless thought I search for you in the crowd with series of cup of tea and used to spend hours. What I miss the most is the way we hide our smiles and you obviously know the reason why I ask you so many questions sometime and why I even get so annoyed when someone else try to get your attention. May be it was for the first time for me, I saw somebody with such a true emotions in the eyes.
Somehow I felt that at least you have the respect for what I'm, you do not deny the way I used to adore you without a spotless mind. At least you don't insult me with a response that how could you do that being a girl?I felt that every moment was a miracle when you come in front of me, as if something is going to change forever and nothing bad could happen to me again when I'm with you. I'm still trying to paint every enduring moments of those few months. I wish it was just longer than this life and we tend to forget the beginning and the end. Or does it become so nostalgic and unforgettable because it was for a little time and we have to walked our way apart just as it is decided.

 I'm sad for the fact that everyone said, it was just a fun part and you have to move on! Why I have to move on, when there is an undying smile which keeps me alive, which dazzles like raindrops reviving my soul. In another thought, it just looks like my own imagination and nothing was there to be serious. I hate the hypocrisy of this world when I'm not even allowed to even say what I feel for you but they will sleep at the end of the day with a stranger in the name of marriage.

Somehow it seems like I also have to go with the flow of the time till the memory lapse without living a space to remember you and your smiles. But I will never let you die and will paint every memory we had in those beautiful days in every pieces of my pages. That will be a true ode to you and my love for you. Last and for all I have never hesitated in saying what I felt till today but your bastardy society is so dirty that there is no space for such love. Let it have the most peaceful death!

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