"Waiting for someone or a friend is something I hate the most. I know it's a bad habit but I do"
Once someone told me when we were about to meet a years of my waiting. Who knows the pain of those eyes who tirelessly watch his photographs even within the dim shadows of the lamppost on the road. I only know how painful it was just living on a hope which will never become a true. Didn't I try to calm the beating hearts of someone else saying that hope is something which makes things easier and lighter. But that's not the truth. Ask me to know the truth, how this one decade seems to went away from my life without even releasing how it was gone.
Once I was madly in love with the man of my own imagination. Almost seven years of hibernation in the love nest and suddenly I wake up with the feeling of hurt, distrust and never be serious attitude. I know I made so many mistakes hurting the one I should not be. Shedding the tears of the one who had loved me truly. I know he lied he never loved me but if I'm in his position I would say the same after whatever mistake I did to him. I know I'm insane for whatever I did to him though I have always complained about the one who hurt me brutally and let me think that I can't roam around in this world with an innocent heart and romantic mind. I don't remember a day, I was not romantic and feel passionate about the feeling of life. Feeling of life includes all, the love, hatred and the lost...
As the time passes everything seems of coming back without any reason. Again it is not a hope or expectation rather it is more about renunciation! This time I'm travelling another thousand miles with an excuse to meet him and make an apology to the one whom I have given a bad time once. I'm going with a baggage of smile and ask him if we can ever be friends. I know how much I long for the one I want to be with once but it was all about remnant and nothing is figurative. Though unlike earlier I will go with another empty heart and mind without asking anything to return from him. Rather I will be more than happy if he ever smile at me without a string of regret and take me back in his loop. I have not got what I want in life and that's not existing in real too. In fact, he is much better in my illusion than the real one. But this expensive journey would be another mission to bring at least 10 watts smile on the face of the one whom once took me as part of his life....
Hope the long wait will come to an end with this September and there be another beginning...
Once someone told me when we were about to meet a years of my waiting. Who knows the pain of those eyes who tirelessly watch his photographs even within the dim shadows of the lamppost on the road. I only know how painful it was just living on a hope which will never become a true. Didn't I try to calm the beating hearts of someone else saying that hope is something which makes things easier and lighter. But that's not the truth. Ask me to know the truth, how this one decade seems to went away from my life without even releasing how it was gone.
Once I was madly in love with the man of my own imagination. Almost seven years of hibernation in the love nest and suddenly I wake up with the feeling of hurt, distrust and never be serious attitude. I know I made so many mistakes hurting the one I should not be. Shedding the tears of the one who had loved me truly. I know he lied he never loved me but if I'm in his position I would say the same after whatever mistake I did to him. I know I'm insane for whatever I did to him though I have always complained about the one who hurt me brutally and let me think that I can't roam around in this world with an innocent heart and romantic mind. I don't remember a day, I was not romantic and feel passionate about the feeling of life. Feeling of life includes all, the love, hatred and the lost...
As the time passes everything seems of coming back without any reason. Again it is not a hope or expectation rather it is more about renunciation! This time I'm travelling another thousand miles with an excuse to meet him and make an apology to the one whom I have given a bad time once. I'm going with a baggage of smile and ask him if we can ever be friends. I know how much I long for the one I want to be with once but it was all about remnant and nothing is figurative. Though unlike earlier I will go with another empty heart and mind without asking anything to return from him. Rather I will be more than happy if he ever smile at me without a string of regret and take me back in his loop. I have not got what I want in life and that's not existing in real too. In fact, he is much better in my illusion than the real one. But this expensive journey would be another mission to bring at least 10 watts smile on the face of the one whom once took me as part of his life....
Hope the long wait will come to an end with this September and there be another beginning...
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