Sunday, June 30, 2013

Life's enduring journey!

Every night is like a drug to me, addicted to it's myth, it keeps me awake since the day I learn to dream. Who says that you can only dream when you fall asleep? With many untold story to narrate, with so many unrealized dreams to fulfill, I fought for every passing second until I finish to paint every piece of an enduring journey!

As usual was over the phone for more than an hour with Shreema and talking hell out of everything starting from A to Z of life, lover, betrayer and we being still the most crazy and witty women who loves life more than anyone else. Being a lover of self and knowing too much important of our own lives is the problem to the world. Sometime people are curious why are we still so happy when we are alone, lonely and have never wasted any time, money and energy on any looser in life? Hah! That's the mystery! We both lived with the believe that there is an absoluteness in love and until and unless we find that we will never compromise. What bind us so close though we lived 4000 miles away from each other is that we never judge each other and we never stop each other from enjoying life!

On loneliness
Just talking about one of our common friend and how she is falling into the trap of a dishonest man and we try to justify a bit with the loneliness of her! But then we question ourselves don't we feel lonely too but did we jump into any unworthy man so far until and unless there is something in that man. Even we think thousand times when it comes to occasional flirting. We are not thinking too much for being judgmental of whether it's moral or immoral. In fact this factor does not exist when it comes to love and it's own crazy world. It's more about why should we share the most important and most purest emotions to someone who is not worth of it?

I know many people who lived a lonely life when they are married and they are with their boyfriends and obviously talking of extra marital affairs and living with the guilt feeling whole life! Why would one do that I can not really understand. No doubt the brutality of being so truthful and strait forward nature thrown us in the bay of loneliness but we don't live with a guilt feeling and we never compromise our dignity at the cost of such loneliness!

Sometime I and Shreema talked about how fulfilling our life is when it comes to our nature of not living with a guilt feeling and our ability to stand with dignity in any situation. Whatever it is there is nothing, we would ever  compromise with self respect and dignity. That hold us so strong till today and so far we have walked thousand miles, done everything for parents that a girl of our age could never dream of, change the trend in the family, locality and we have parents who held their head so high whenever they talk about their daughter.

Whenever we count on what we both have done as a girl, on giving a different meaning to womanhood, a daughter, a sister, a writer and our involvement with the society, we both laugh out and said lets just relax and we have done so much in such a young age. For a woman of our age, they think of buying gold, furniture for marriage, finding a man with a handsome salary and more over -about settling down-that's something I don't understand till now! It's so funny when they talk about maturity and defining marriage as something settled position! I laugh out like there is something called divorce also! They find me crazy and said you are a pessimist but it's all about living with the truth and knowing the reality of life! I'm not saying that every couple should divorce but still living with my own principle that I will not compromise with something which will exploit me and my individuality!

Well, life is so far so pleasant and have gone through so much of pain but everything ends with a positive note, a great lesson of life, making me realized how important my life is and how much I enjoy my loneliness without letting any unworthy person to intrude it! So what when we have no one to hug and cry when we are alone! At least, we can walk in the rain, let it wash away the bleeding tears whilst it will leave us with an ever lasting smile.

I don't want to think too much about the future and never think about the past now. Discarded all the old scars of worthless lovers in mind just like the residue after a chemical test in the laboratory and this is not called moving on rather knowing the worth of my life than anyone else and loving something more worth than any one of them. Everything seems so fresh nowadays just like the first rain of the season, just like the charm of the innocent child, life seems too content. embracing everything in its way. It is no longer the end of the season of love rather spring's unusual visit-seeing only those smiling faces, watching only those people with so much of love, admiration at you and people who would do anything just for a spotless smile without any return and finally it learn to remember only those whose memory could make to you walk in the rain, sing and dance in its own rhythm!

Don't ask me know what I'm thinking? In fact I'm smiling thinking about someone's smiling face and literally thinking how would I say him that I missed terribly his smiling face! Nevertheless, I will not say that -what's fun when every mystery between us is broken!

There is one thing I have earned so hard in life -it is not about possessing the one you love or admired and running after him but rather giving each other a thousand watt smile and truly enjoyed to see someone living with his own freedom without bothering the chains of relations! 

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